Part 8: Beware the Naked Man Who Offers You His Shirt

Spurned by the lovely Esuna, Wilme realizes he needs to pump himself up if he's to win her love. Or survive more than a few seconds outside of Bonro, for that matter.

So, off we go!

This lovely motherfucker is a Manrot, who resembles assorted meat products slapped together and handed a couple swords. The swords are extremely nasty, plus they can cast Ice for about 45 damage AND Petrify.

Defeating them levels Wilme up, but he's still just not tough enough. The game is clearly giving me a hint here, and that hint is: Party up, jerk.

But not with Kamil. What a nerd. By the way, if you're wondering how this works, basically every 10 battles or so the game "rolls" a result on a table that determines whether another Apprentice will ask to fight, ask to join you, or just blow you off. The majority of the time it will come up as neutral, but different characters have different probabilities of the other options. People hate Lejes for example (though he's slightly more likely to join Esuna), and Wilme likes picking fights with everything and everyone. If you fight long enough, though, you can theoretically get anyone as a partner.

Still the twilight ice princess, Esuna just ain't having it. Fine then, fuck you guys. I'm going to Zellis.

The only way you can tell Zellis isn't Bonro is because it's not next to an ocean. Of course you probably don't even remember that Bonro was next to an ocean, so you'll just have to take my word for it that I didn't just take a screenshot of the same town.

Until I progress with the game, the six other Apprentices are stuck in either Bonro or Zellis. Since Lejes, Kamil, and Esuna turned up in Bonro, that means Lux, Olvan, and Valsu are in Zellis.

Sure enough, Lux is in the armor shop.

Hmmmm, nope, I still don't give a shit about Melenam.

Why is this some kind of whispered rumor? Is there something unusual about a historian finding a historical place? Is this clandestine information? Are you trying to sell me drugs? Because if so I've probably already got 9 of them and I'd rather not waste money.

Olvan gives the biggest bullshit excuse I've ever heard for not teaming up. Wilme is just surprised by the revelation that dwarves have spines.

I'm in the middle of a project too, asshole, it's called "finding the fucking Runes." I swear to God you're all the laziest pricks I've ever met. You teleport between towns and hang out in bars. Are you even trying?

More info from the townsfolk about the worthless tr- waaaaaaait a second. Someone actually gave me useful information! The Wind Rune is in the ruins of Melenam apparently, and some historian knows where they are. Gosh, I bet I'm supposed to go looking for the Wind Rune.

I'm pretty sure no one in the entire world of Ticondera knows what the Runes actually do.

If... if you don't know what question I'm asking, and don't remember if I'll find it, why are you telling me exactly where I can find it? :psylon:

Incidentally, I'm not looking for an answer. I'm looking for a thing. A Rune. Unless my question was "where can I find the Wind Rune?" I guess.

I guess these gray guys really are aliens, because they're not human and they're apparently not TETUJIN either. This doesn't explain why Wilme is twice their size, orange, and naked, but hey, that's why I'm the Apprentice and they're robot fanboys.

And of course none of the ones that look as awesome as this guy would ever join me.

Haha, keep telling yourself that, random town NPC. The Manrots circling the city gates are going to love you.

A Manrot gets sassy with Wilme and petrifies itself thanks to a Mirror. Eat shit, chicken fingers.

Returning to town to resupply and rest, Wilme discovers something quite shocking.

High off his mind on painkillers for his bad back, Olvan comes on to Wilme something fierce. Nervous about what people will say when they see an orange alien and a dwarf tailing each other around, but eager to have an ally, Wilme drags Olvan along for now.

Olvan comes with the latest equipment and is nearly as strong as Wilme is physically, though his raw stats are quite inferior. However, Olvan can actually equip weapons and armor, and the best weapons and armor at that. His Anim(al?) Axe is nearly as strong as the Nature Sword sold in Zellis, which is itself a huge upgrade. Of course, Olvan can use the Nature Sword, and while it's only a marginal upgrade, it's not like I'm using my money for anything right now.

Since we now have a character who buys gear, we get to see how cumbersome the shopping interface is. You don't just buy weapons; you trade in whatever you're using plus extra cash to cover the difference, and God help you if you can't pay or decide to back out, because it will make sure you're REALLY sure.

Anyway, off to grind a little. Things are much smoother with a friend.

And what a friend. Olvan is a beastly fighter.

And he has a good mix of spells. Shame he's so bad with them. This isn't so bad though; Olvan learns Heal1 through Heal3, as well as Revive1, and since his attack magic is just awful he can use all of his MP for healing. Heal1 is equivalent to a Pot1 but has a very low MP cost; M.Herbs and Heal1 are more cost-effective than Pot1s. Unless of course those potions are free, and just about everything is dropping them right now.

Wilme and Olvan level up. Note that Olvan's stats, on average, are 6 HP, 2 MP, and 3 in every other stat; he makes up for the lower stat growth with his gear, and in the late game will pull ahead of Wilme in attack power, but Wilme definitely has the edge in raw stats. He's also very slow, so I'll want to get him 4 Speed every level if possible.

Meanwhile, Valsu is still a dick.